Evensong at Stanwich Church

 
Hi, I’m Bianca Wren and I’d like to give you a quick overview of my background and how I found peace at Stanwich Church and in a sense “came back to the table with a renewed sense of enlightenment.” My father was Muslim, my mother a Lutheran, my sister and I were baptized Protestants, we went to Catholic schools for 17 years and my sister married a Jewish man. My father came from a country where they veil their women, my mother came from a country where they play volleyball naked on the beach. We were raised to be open and accepting of all cultures and religions. My experience as the only Protestant in a strict Catholic school was far from easy. In the 1st school, it was grades 1 – 8 with one class per grade. So I went to school with the same 20 kids for 8 solid years. We had religious studies every day and went to mass together every Wednesday. I studied the Sacraments over the years, passing every written test with stellar grades. For Holy Communion, I was taught for months to walk through the church routine learning the steps that would lead me to the priest for Communion. But when actual Communion finally arrived, I stood up when the rest of my classmates stood up in the pew to prepare to walk up the aisle. I felt a large hand swoop down on my little shoulder and push me sharply back into my seat. My teacher, in the pew behind me, hissed in my ear, “Not you, you’re different.” I was only 7 years old. I was only in 2nd grade. But I remember it like it was yesterday. And from that moment, I was reminded that I was different. 37 years have passed since that 1st devastating moment at Communion. I went to church throughout the years, on and off, in the different states I lived in – having moved a lot for my career in TV. But no matter how much I was taken in by the lovely people in my communities, I continued to feel different and guilty in church – the way the establishment taught me to feel. Then 6 months ago my family started attending Stanwich Church, an invitation by Chris Burlingame, and every mass I’d find myself crying. I’d cry often and found it fascinating that in every window frame was a box of tissues. I’d cry and didn’t know why. Until a woman spoke to the congregation a few months ago. She said she came to this church and felt like she zipped down a “fat suit of guilt” from her head to her feet and stepped out enlightened. That was it! I felt that! And then Pastor Joan said shortly before Communion, “Come to the table and join this meal, honoring whatever traditions you have learned.” I couldn’t believe it! Was this actually open to everyone and all traditions? Did I hear her right? We were united through our belief in Christ – with no other strings attached. There was no guilt, there was no cruel hand on my shoulder, there was only God and me. Then I started to cry again. It was the overwhelming burden of the “fat suit” being unzipped and I was stepping out of years of hurt and confusion. I never ever lost my faith or belief in Jesus Christ, but through Stanwich Church – and all of you – I have found a renewed spirit of belief in the “establishment” - in a church itself – finally! Through this video, the world can see what makes Stanwich Church special, what a mass should look like and feel like, and why my spirit has been renewed. I wanted to capture the traditional Communion celebration, the prayer stations and ancient traditions mixed with modern elements. I wanted to capture the arm-in-arm moments when we take our neighbor into our space and create a peaceful connection with each other. I wanted to give back to all of you at Stanwich Church, and show my gratitude for lightening my heart, lifting my spirit and giving me a place to feel comfortable and finally call my own – to praise God and to partake in the Communion celebration! My children love it, my husband loves it and I love it here. Thank you all. Evensong_files/Evensong4web.mp4.zip